When I first had Liv, as coincidence would have it, I suddenly started to get invited for more and more out-of-town blog events, all expenses covered.
As tempting as it sounded, especially the ability to sleep peacefully on an airplane, I couldn’t do it.
I knew if I went away she would be absolutely fine with Tom (plus we’re so lucky to have my mom and nana to lend a hand when we need it) but the magnet I felt attaching me to her kept me declining anything that would have me spend more than a night without her in the room next to me.
Maybe it had a little bit to do with my postpartum anxiety, but I think it had everything to do with the fact that I just wasn’t ready to leave. I didn’t want to miss a second of her growing, a good snuggle, even a rough night, and was also worried about keeping up my milk supply with the pumping/breastfeeding rendezvous. I wasn’t ready.
When I got the phone call asking me to be a ZOOMA ambassador and run the Cape Cod race in September, I debated it for a while and reminded ZOOMA that I’m not a hardcore runner and just wanted to get back into casually running. I figured that at one point or another, I’d have to get back in the swing of occasional blog trips. I don’t consider them “work trips” because they’re something I enjoy and I’m never required to go, but I like to attend different events and meet new people. I figured it would be good for me to finally say yes, after almost a year of “no’s,” so I accepted.
Sure enough, September was here before I knew it, I’m no longer breastfeeding (even though I would love to still be, I pumped until I had nothing left), and I feel like I can handle missing Liv for a few nights. I’ve been really excited about seeing Cape Cod, getting some down time -I joked with Tom that when I wasn’t running I was going to hibernate in my hotel and sleep with my eye mask on- and then last week, it hit me like a ton of bricks. I was walking through Basha’s, grabbing some grocery essentials, when I felt tears coming from nowhere.
I’m sure many moms can relate, but it’s not worrying about her being ok, because I know she will be. It’s just that after spending 8+ months (plus the time in utero) with her, I’ll miss having my little buddy close to me.
I’m fortunate that I’m able to spend so much time at home and am lucky I’ve been able to wait this long before spending a little time away. I know many moms with full-time jobs have to travel for work soon after having a baby, so I’m not trying to complain. I figure 4 days is just enough time for me to feel refreshed, and very ready to come home.
Any moms have tips for making it a little easier?
I’m sure I’ll be distracted all weekend, but
I’m planning on sleeping a ton, too.