Becoming a yoga mommy
I like to think (hope?) that becoming a mom has made me more patient.
Before, I had ants in my pants about 24/7. I HAAAAATED waiting in line (and would determine which line/cashier combo was the fastest within .2 seconds), had a mild case of road rage, and was always in a hurry. When Liv was born, I immediately slowed down (the all day and night nursing sessions are a good way to make it happen) and now, if I run two errands in one day, it is a victory. i also don’t yell the f-bomb while driving, and am even more cautious of everyone around me. Even though it sometimes seems like I have less time and more to do, I’ve become more efficient, and if something doesn’t get done, it’s ok.
All in all, I really want to be a good mom to Liv, be patient with her, and for her to always know she’s wanted, needed and loved.
I came across this article on becoming a yoga parent, and it really stuck with me.
Here are some of the key values discussed in the article:
1) Respect. There are guaranteed to be moments where we see things differently. Instead of immediately shutting her opinion down because she’s “little,” I’m going to endeavor to see things from her point of view and show her respect, even when we disagree.
2) Include them in your practice. I don’t practice yoga as much as I used to, or as I’d like to, but I want to make sure she’s included in the things I enjoy, whether we Zumba in the living room, make dinner, or just sit and read on the patio. On the same token, it’s important to me to be interested in the things she enjoys (which I can’t wait to find out how they change over time- it’s an exciting mystery)
3) Be patient. She’s learning so quickly, and I can see that while it might take more time for her to do things herself, I’m excited to wait and watch, and try to be as patient as possible. Right now, one of my favorite things to do is to work on her “crawl” with her and cheer her on. I’m thinking it will be kind of similar when she learns to walk, tie her shoes, etc.
4) Get out in nature. This one is really important to me because I feel like a lot of this has died with the increase of technology use among kids. When I was little, Kyle and I were outside ALL the time. We had neighborhood friends, would play hide and seek, war, ride our bikes, go swimming, and it was a lot of fun. Of course, we had our share of TV, but think we had a pretty good mix of the two. For now, she loves swimming outside, or even just going for walks to look at the plants, birds, and playing with Bell.
5) Listen to them. It has a lot to do with the respect thing- I think kids like to feel like what they have to say is important and that the adult is actually listening.
Just as in yoga, parenting seems to be a “practice.” There’s no such thing as perfect, everyone’s pose (or parenting) looks different, and you focus, breathe and enjoy the present moment. Each day, you just go into it with an open mind, open heart, and hoping to do the best you can <3
What is something that’s important to you about parenting?
Something your parents did to make you feel loved? When I rode the bus to school, my mom would meet me at the bus stop and walk home with me. Every day, she would ask me about my day at school and looking back, I blabbed her ear off, about EVERYTHING. She always listened and was interested to hear about my friends and classes.
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Very sweet post.. I’m hoping i’ll be more patient when I’m eventually married and a mom, too.
I am not a mother yet, but I did have a miscarriage earlier this year and I just want to say that I LOVE everything about this post and I completely agree with all the above practices. I will be saving this post for my future as a mother! Thank you so much for sharing!
I’m hoping that I’ll be more patient when I get to the baby stage – I definitely get antsy way too easily now!
When I was younger, I took dance lessons in a town 30 minutes away. My mom drive me to those lessons every Saturday morning for YEARS – 10 of them. And when I wanted to take extra lessons one year, she drove me to a town 45 minutes away every Tuesday night. During the winter. Looking back now, I can see how much time and effort she put into my hobby and I’m extremely grateful.
Your desert photo made me think of hiking in the Mojave desert with my daughter as soon as she could walk at 10 months. Now at seven years she hikes and bikes and swims and skates and jumps rope and accuses other children of being couch potatoes. I’m a very proud mama!
I love this.
I have a 5 month old son. It’s very important to me that he has manners and respect for others. I want him to be a little gentlemen: open doors for elderly, remove his hat during dinner and the Pledge of Allegiance (big pet peeve of mine), say thank you. Stuff like that. I feel like chilvery is dieing and it makes me sad. I realize it’s not 1920 anymore but that doesnt give boys the right to be little punks. You know?
I also want to make him feel so special on his birthdays, when he reaches milestones, when he accomplishes something in school. I didn’t get this as a child but instead of being bitter, I’m just going to make sure my own child knows that he is always loved and that we are proud of him. I never want him to feel like he isn’t good enough.
Ironically, I think being a mom has made me more edgy and in a hurry. I’m always rushing even more now to either get back to my baby, rush to shower, get in a fast workout, do chores, etc., rush home to feed him, rush out to do errands so we can get home to feed him or put him to bed. It never ends.
Marci, if I’m completely honest, I have to agree with you. And just when I started being able to slow down a little (as first daughter got older, only needed one nap, bedtime more flexible, etc), I had a second baby (-: So now I have a 3 year old and a 3 month old, and it’s more hectic than ever…..for now.
“parenting seems to be a practice” Beautiful. What works for one may not work for another. You are an amazing mom Gina. Baby Liv is lucky to have been brought into such an amazing family.
This is awesome. I think it’s so beautiful that women are taking the principles of yoga and bringing them to their parenting tactics. Love and respect for you, lady!
Love this! I definitely agree with respecting your children, my daughter is just now really trying to talk to us and gets visibly upset if we fail to acknowledge her, even if it is just baby babbling. I know I would feel the same way if someone was ignoring my attempts at communication!
As far as including her in my yoga practice goes, one of her favorite things to do is downward facing dog. I know she’s mostly mocking me (her actual favorite thing haha) but its pretty much the most adorable thing ever!
Giving children the space to explore what their passions are; drawing, art, music, sports, whatever it is. Less steering and telling our daughter “you have to do x” and much more “oh, you like that? Would you like to do more of it? Ok I can make that happen…” Giving them the freedom to explore what is of interest to them, not what we as adults think they ‘should’ be doing!
My most special memories are when my mom or dad would take me out to lunch during the school day. I remember feeling so special and so loved when this happened from the time I was in kindergarten through my senior year of high school.
Even though I don’t have kids yet, I always love reading your family posts. I think this was such a sweet post. I, too, am type A, always in a hurry, people can’t move fast enough for me (I think part of it is personality and part is my job (I’m an ER nurse)). I hope that having a family will help me to slow down some, too. I can totally see how it would.
My parents and I always were (and still are) VERY close. More often than not, I chose to go out with them rather than with my own friends 🙂
I think being a mom has definitely made me much more patient! He enjoys helping me with chores and working out with me, and even though it takes us 10 times longer to do everything, I’m careful to take my time and let him be independent, and I try to make sure he knows I hear every word he says.
When I feel myself losing my patience, I try to remind myself that my actions are teaching him to treat other people with (or without!) respect.
Love this post! 🙂
Love this post! I, too, became more patient when I had my daughter.
It is refreshing not to feel so much “rage” all the time.
One thing I’ve learned is that motherhood can be a challenge. When they are throwing temper tantrums and we are bending over backwards trying to please them, it can be rough! Someone once told me that babies have complex emotions and that is their way of conveying them- they really have no other outlet yet. Whatever the case may be, something in their worlds is upsetting and it’s important to respect those feelings. That really put things into perspective for me. I know that when I am upset over something, all I really want is understanding and comfort. Patience is truly a virtue for parents.
As a stay-at-home mom of a four year old boy, i practice patience daily. And often fail miserably. Something I strive to do in parenting is respect my son. I try never to give the answer “Because I said so.” he’s a person, not my little minion and therefore deserves to be listened to and provided with satisfactory answers/responses that I would say to anyone else. Nourishing his interests is also important to me, whether those interests are dancing, chess, soccer, or cooking. Raising a well-rounded, secure, kind, and empathetic man is my goal! Btw, I think you are doing an amazing job with Olivia…she is beyond precious.
Those are lovely thoughts about parenting.
It’s really simple, but we always sat down to dinner together as a family and talked about our day. I think it was a really wonderful opportunity for us all to unwind and bond.
This is such a wonderful list! You’re already an amazing mother!
Yoga really does change lives and I love the yoga parent pointers 🙂 I don’t have a baba but I do know that yoga has changed my life and other people I love & admire most. My fathers partner suffered a really awful stroke in her 30’s and was told she would never walk or talk properly ever again. She is the most well spoken lady I know and is just a joy to be around and best of all she is able to walk again. She strongly believes it was through her practice daily that she was able to function again so it goes to show how amazing an influence of yoga can have y’know? xxx
When we were kids, we lived in the country and didn’t have many tv stations(late 80’s/early 90’s). Our summers were spent at the softball and baseball fields where my sister, brother and I each played on different teams. Then both of my parents played in an adult league. We were ALWAYS busy. But, we were ALWAYS together. Once the season ended, we would spend evenings outside riding our bikes (too hot to do in the desert heat during the day) and eventually, we would spread a blanket on the front lawn to star gaze or watch a storm rolling in over the next town. Lightening storms and stars gazing really made our summers.
In the winter, we heated our house with a woodburning stove. We had central heat but it was too expensive to use and not as reliable if there was an ice storm. We preferred the wood stove anyway because it was just so cozy. If the electric was out, we would cook beans or soup on the stove and all of us would sit around it and talk about our days. We begged our parents to tell us stories about their childhood. It wasn’t uncommon for us to ask to turn off the tv and sit around the stove…just because.
Those are the things I look forward to when I have kids. Taking time to make the little things a big thing.
You’re a great mom, Gina. I love your blog so very much and read it daily for a lift.
Wonderful post! Parenting does seem to be a practice and everyone does things differently, you just have to remember to do what’s right for your family. I definitely try to do this list with my 3 year old, but it’s nice to have a reminder occasionally. 🙂
Love this post 🙂 When I was in preschool, I would cry leaving my mom everyday…until about two weeks in, she had an idea. She took her red lipstick from her purse, applied it to her lips, and kissed the inside of her hand. She told me that I could look at that kiss anytime I felt lonely or missed her that day. This memory still touches my heart and reminds me to always be mindful when children have separation anxiety at school ( I teach preschool!)
<3
Aw loved reading your insights here because it gives me hope that when I (eventually) become a mom, I’ll lose some of my impatience and need to be on the go all.the.time. Thanks Gina 🙂
I love this. I’m not a parent, but I feel like I had such a good mom. My dad died when I was young, so I don’t remember much about him as easily…but I know I felt loved by both. I don’t think my mom EVER snapped or yelled at me in public. I always felt very safe and understood by her as a child. I think patience is key…of course I’m not a parent, but I always see parents just lose their cool. And I’m sure it’s very stressful at times, but I love when I see parents act very patient and forgiving with their child.