Family: the nerves

With as many things as there are to be excited about, it seems there are so many things to also be worried about. I think it’s a tougher point right now because no one knows we’re expecting, and I don’t really have anyone to talk to about it. It feels good to type, and at least feel like someone is listening to me, and someone may be feeling the same anxious energy about the same thing.

I have my first doctor’s appointment tomorrow, and am just praying to hear that little heartbeat. I was starting to get anxious about finding out whether everything is healthy/normal and I realized two things: 1) worrying doesn’t change anything, and 2) the worrying never really goes away. When Liv was born, it was a bit of a scary moment because the cord was wrapped and we had to get her immediately to oxygen. When she was finally snuggled in my chest, and I saw that indeed, she was a beautiful, perfect, healthy baby, it’s not like that sigh of relief was when the worry stopped. It was really just beginning. I worry about her ALL the time. Now, I’ll have someone else to worry about, and care about, and love so much that my heart can’t take it. And that’s something to be so very excited about. <3

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  1. Katie on April 9, 2015 at 5:39 pm

    Oh my gosh, THANK YOU for posting these! I am in the same boat now as you were then. First month trying for our second. Took a negative pregnancy test…then got a positive one a few days later. Now I’m only a little over 5 weeks and dying to tell my family, friends, and anyone who will listen! When I called my OB, they told me the first appointment wasn’t until TEN weeks. No blood test, no consultation, no ultrasound…nothing!! I’m so so anxious to hear a heartbeat and know that everything is OK, but 5 weeks seems like an eternity!!

    Whew, sorry for that novel, but it’s so great to read these posts and realize I am hardly the only woman to have gone through this 🙂 Praying we both continue to have healthy pregnancies!! <3

    • Fitnessista on April 9, 2015 at 9:44 pm

      congratulations to you!! YES. it’s so hard to wait that long! i seriously wondered if i went to urgent care if they’d find the heartbeat for me.
      sending lots of love to you!

  2. Cassie Vaughn on April 10, 2015 at 12:24 pm

    I love all these posts you’ve put up for us especially since I’m pregnant the first time too! I actually have not been nervous— first time mom confidence? In fact, my doc sent me to get a high risk ultrasound done toward the end of my 1st trimester because of something she saw. I – of course – freaked out at first. However, that night, I had a little talk with baby, and we agreed that she would let me know if something was wrong… that the docs (especially in my personal experience) are often wrong and overly anxious to diagnose a problem. And so far the news is we’re having a very healthy little baby girl!

  3. Lara on April 10, 2015 at 2:47 pm

    OMG yes. I could torture myself with worry (and sometimes I do), but then I realize that with children it just doesn’t end. Terrible things happen to people at any age of their life, and those people all have parents who worried about them. All we can do is hope (and pray, if it’s your way) for the best, prepare for as much as we can, and embrace what is thrown at us. Accepting that it’s not all in our control is a slight comfort.
    I am so happy for you!

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