Choosing a BC option
Number 2??
Not so fast…
One of the questions that every single medical professional has asked since we had the baby:
“Have you thought about birth control options?”
Even my homeopathic doc, whom I spoke with yesterday about milk production tips and the like said, “don’t let your husband look at you the wrong way- you’re Fertile Mrytle right now.”
I’ve got the newest love of my life
(she LOVES the Moby wrap!)
but I think we’d like to wait at least a couple of years until a sibling makes an appearance.
Birth control isn’t prevalent at this second since I haven’t been cleared to resume physical activity, but I’m not quite sure what we’re going to do. I took birth control pills for 12 years, and while it’s a fantastic option for many, I didn’t like how it affected my hormones. I switched over to the Fertility Awareness Method two years before we got pregnant, and was hoping to be able to continue to use that method after the baby was born. Here’s the thing, though: you need to take your temperature every morning, at the same time, after a full night’s sleep. Since sleep and I haven’t seen each other for a while, it’s not going to work right now.
Breastfeeding is supposed to protect you from getting pregnant, but it’s not foolproof because you can ovulate before starting an actual cycle without knowing. Tom nor myself are fans of condoms (TMI but they put a damper on things), IUDs freak me out a little bit, and I’d really like to avoid taking birth control pills again. I think that’s smashing all of the possible options?
Did anyone out there have success with natural family planning while breastfeeding?
Of course, we’ll do whatever we need to do, and if I were to get pregnant again as a surprise, it wouldn’t be any less of a blessing <3
And honestly, a full night’s sleep would be pretty close competition to mattress mambo right now…
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I love that you talk about stuff like this. Suggestions? I have none. haha. I hear ya about condoms, though ;).
yes. eww. haha
spermicide?
ABout 6 months after I gave birth I went on the mini-pill (progesterone only). its the only pill that will not affect the quality or the quantity of your milk. I was expecting the worse in terms of reaction, but I have to say these pills are a pleasure. I know they affect everyone differently, but I am doing way better on them than any other pill I was ever on. Even after I stop breastfeeding I will still continue them. They require more ” take-on-time” dilligence than the regular pill but to me, totally worth it. Talk to your doctor and see what they say.
hmm definitely something to research
That’s exactly what I was going to suggest — I was on the “mini-pill” for two years after E. was born and they never affected me the same way normal pills do, hormone wise. The only caveat with those is that you HAVE to take them at the exact same time every day. Since they’re not as powerful as normal BCPs, the timing is crucial. Good luck!
I’m researching these right now. Jackie and Danielle, do you still get a period a period on the mini pill?
Since you only need to take your temp after being asleep for 4 or more hours, maybe just start the FAM up again after she can sleep for that long in between night feedings and waking up in the mornings?
oh that’s a good idea!
wait, you mean she’ll sleep more than 4 hours?! i pray for the day, haha
My doctor suggested IUD and it freaked me out too. I use a nuva ring and I love it. I hated having to remember to take a pill everyday, so the nuva ring is perfect for me.
The nuva ring works for me. It doesn’t make me crazy like other birth control does, but I could see how it can put a damper on things in the bedroom when you have to take it out…
What do you mean take it out? Do you mean before sex? I never do that, although it has fallen out during sex before. No biggie, just put it back in. 🙂
I just quit the nuva ring in favor of the FAM method. While I was on the nuva ring I never had to take it out except after the third week when it was supposed to come out…
I quite the nuva ring for FAM, too–the ring made me bat sh*t crazy. I was so emotional and had zero sex drive (so I suppose it was really effective!).
I didn’t take it out and it was never an issue… even if he could occasionally feel it, it wasn’t a mood killer to him!!! I miss the nuva ring!
I’ve been on NuvaRing for about 6 years (before that the Pill for 7), and I love it! Very few hormone-related side effects (migraines went away, yay!) and I love only having to think about it once a month.
I’m not sure what the commenter above is talking about re: taking it out in the bedroom… I only take it out to change it, at the end of the month, like you’re supposed to. My DH doesn’t feel it at all… 😉
I actually liked being on the Pill and plan to go back. For us, it’s the best option! Looking cute in the wrap!
I’m interested to see what people say – I was hoping to use the FAM for all the same reasons. I used it for 3 years as bc before we started trying, but obviously things change when you’re breastfeeding and not sleeping.
side note – did you have help designing your webpage? I’m looking into starting a blog and its so over my head its ridiculous.
yes, cody is my web wizard genius: http://www.codysmith.us/
i tossed this same question around for the entire year i nursed and 3 months post-nursing i still haven’t figured out a plan. i hate birth control with any sort of hormones because it makes me vomit which i think probably cancels out the fact that i took it. i have been wanting to try FAM ever since you first blogged about it but honestly, it makes me nervous. i totally get hating condoms because that’s what we’ve been using since our little guy was born and we HATE them. i am SO glad you posted this because maybe i can figure out a solution soon. or maybe i will take the time to research FAM and give it a try. we’re at a point where a surprise baby wouldn’t be such a bad thing 😉
p.s. precious pic of olivia! i used the sleepy wrap (just like the moby wrap) and LOVED it. alex would sleep in it and i could walk forever wearing him. man i miss that cozy baby stage!
oh, and something else about the mattress mambo that my doctor warned me about but i never thought it would be so bad or last so long…it HURT. like, brought me to tears. you may not have the same issue but for me, i hated it. my doctor assured me it was normal but it never really felt comfortable until after i stopped nursing. i’m totally not saying this to scare you but i wish someone had told me so i felt “normal”. luckily my husband was completely understanding and it made things a lot easier on me. ok, i’m done 🙂
aww i’ve heard that. i’m a little scared for the day
We’re four months out and still haven’t done the deed. Maybe it’s just me but painful is an understatement. I’m still bfing, so hopefully it won’t be do bad later.
My baby is 2 months now and we’ve “done the deed” once. I was a little scared too! We took it slow and lubed up and it wasn’t bad. My midwife suggested that the woman should be on top so she has more control. It’s definitely a weird feeling after everything that’s gone on down there! I highly suggest lube!! Also – now, it’s an issue of finding time…Too bad he’s sleeping now because it would be a good time. 😉
My Midwife also suggested the Today Sponge.
breastfeeding causes vaginal dryness, severely so in some women. lube. lots of it. 🙂
(mental note taken)
😉
yes. like when you think you have enough, put more. 😉
Although my dr. encouraged me to have her prescribe me BC after I delivered my little one, I told her we were going to practice other methods. I actually went off of BC shortly after I got married, because my new hubby said he couldn’t deal with my mood swings, due to all of the hormones. Now we have never actually followed natural family planning or temperature taking, rather the method my husband likes to call “pull and pray” (sorry is that too graphic haha). Anyway, just wanted to let you know there are options that don’t require the hormones, drs just like to put you on them so if you come back in 9 months after baby 1 was born they can say “I told you so :)”
Pull & pray! Love that! Made me laugh this morning 🙂
Haha I love how open you are about this. My MIL reads my blog and I know she’d freak out if I dug too deep into this kind of stuff haha. I have no advice since we’re in the same boat. I dont take BC because I don’t like how it affects my hormones and gives me migraines so the hunk and I just pull and pray haha. I mean…it’s worked for us for 5 years up until last year lol.
my nana reads my blog. haha
HAHA pull and pray! i love it
My cousin did “pull & pray” – now she has two kids 16 months apart! Whoops!
yikeeessss
I’ve been on several types of BC and they have all affected me in negative ways and then when I found myself single for a time, I decided to try without.
Even once I got serious with my boyfriend and now live together, I am still off BC and haven’t sought other alternatives. We do the “pull and pray” (haha) and I track my cycle on my iphone ( +1 for technology!) and during the time of the month I am supposedly most fertile, we use a condom (though not always). So, we’ve been pullin’ and prayin’ for 3 years now and no babies yet!
*Though it makes me wonder if one of us has any issues that will come to head when we DO try to conceive. :-/
My husband and I may just be freakishly fertile, but I am currently 35 weeks pregnant after “pull and pray” for only maybe 3 times? I’d always been very, very faithful to my birth control, but ran out. Maybe 3 “horizontal mambos” of “pull and pray” later and here we are. I will always encourage people to use something, anything other that method! 🙂
My hubby and I usually pull out too and we haven’t gotten pregnant yet, but we sometimes us condoms too. I know pulling out doesn’t always prevent a baby, and we don’t really enjoy the condoms and I know he doesn’t like them at all but we aren’t 100% ready to start really trying to get pregnant, I if it happens it happens <3
Gina, I don’t think I’ve ever made a comment on your blog before, but I love it (especially all the baby stuff!) I have a 15 month old myself. We used Natural Family Planning for 4 years before getting pregnant (now we are using nothing, as my fertility didn’t return until 13 months post-partum – yay breastfeeding – and we want our kids to be close together!), and I want to highly suggest the Creighton Method. You do have to take a class or two to get the hang of it (offered at some doctor’s offices and through many Catholic churches…but don’t let that throw you!) but it really is a HIGHLY effective, easy to use (once you get the hang of it) method. Good luck!
I second this. It still takes some effort, but works well.
Yes! I’m newly married, and my husband and I chose t use the Creighton Method because 1) I hated the way BC hormones affected my body, and 2) I didn’t want to have to take my temp every day. Once you get the hang of it, the Creighton method is very easy and has been very effective for us so far. We love it!
I completly agree with the Creighton Method. My husband and I use it because I could NEVER figure out temperature taking. I actually found a doula through a Catholic Church (they have never once pressured me to be Catholic FYI) and she has coached us through almost a year of it. I highly recommend it.
Hahah you’re my favorite. I was on birth control for two years, and I’m just going back on it now. As a college student … I’d rather not ever take risks. I’d love to hear about other solutions!
We were facing the same dilemma, so my hubs had a little surgery 😉 but that was after 3 kids. I’m pretty sure my husband’s deployments were the best form of BC for us! 🙂
My youngest are 13 months apart….so I would say we have ‘experience’ with natural family planning and breastfeeding. 😉 I was up most of the night feeding my oldest and things obviously were out of wack with sleep patterns, etc, and boom, pregnant while the little one was 3.5 months old. I nursed through pregnancy and tandem nursed, but man, it was tough. The littlest is definitely a blessing, but an unexpected one.
I now have an IUD and LOVE it. I only have spotting maybe every 3 months and, for me, it’s fantastic. Good luck with whichever method you choose.
I do not have a child so I have no advice on the breast feeding option. However I have the Paragard (non hormonal IUD) and I really enjoy it so far. I did the FAM method and found that my temp shifted a lot with my sleep patterns so it was hard to be rely on it. Hope you find an option that works for you.
It isn’t TMI at all haha and don’t worry, I think the condoms thing is a shared opinion…my fiance and I aren’t fans either!!! They just aren’t right, lol
She’s got gorgeous eyelashes x
Wow, that’s something you never really think you have to think about after having a baby. I know you and Tom will find what works for you! Maybe TMI but I’m on Seasonique and I love only having to deal with 4 periods a year!
Second that. LOVE Seasonique. I was on Yaz for several years before my Seasonique days and detested it, but Seasonique works very well (at least for me) with no side effects. Four periods a year is a nice plus too!
Though I am years away from having a baby, I think I will go with a hormone free IUD (Paragard) once I’m in that stage of life. I know it’s a little freaky, but I think worth looking into since it doesn’t involve hormones and is quite effective. Good luck! 🙂
I love the FAM method too. Plus, charting totally brings out the inner geek in me. 🙂 but yeah the whole no sleeping thing makes it pretty much impossible.
I wanted to get the IUD but my uterus is tilted backward which can cause issues so went with Implanon. (The rod that goes in your upper arm) It is breastfeeding safe, lasts for 3 years and the worrier in me likes that I can just touch my arm and feel it for reassurance. Plus, the insertion was so easy!
Hopefully we can go back to charting but for now this works & I haven’t experienced any side effects.
maybe that’s why i love it too? i love chart analysis 😉
i have never heard of implanon- that’s really interesting!
I will say that Implanon works the same way IUDs do… just in a different location. So if IUDs creep you out in the sense that you can still fertilize but not implant, Implanon isn’t the way to go either.
I’m getting my implanon put in tomorrow. I had Norplant years ago and loved it. I was going to go with the IUD but too many close friends did not have good experiences with it so I chickened out.
I don’t know the percentages for sure,,,but I know the pregnancy rate is pretty low while breastfeeding.I know some people very close to me that have iud’s and they love them.Technology has come a long ways with all that stuff.There is the diafram and cream that is very affective.I have no doubt that hubby would not mind at all if you gave him oral pleasure until you get ready,,I know TMI,,,Sorry,,,then you,and him could use toys on you,,,just a thought Momma. wink*
I remember this intense pressure to pick something for BC right after our baby was born. Ultimately, I decided on nothing and I’m glad with that decision. My 9 month old is all the BC I need! Seriously. Thanks to exclusive BF, I haven’t had a period (although you ovulate first so it’s anyone’s guess as to when you are first fertile). I also thought since it took us a few months to get pregnant, if it happens, then it happens. Again, thanks to the new baby, it doesn’t happen all that much 😉
I used Natural Family Planning and got pregnant with baby #3 (oops)! She is an angel but she was definitely unexpected. I got pregnant with my 2nd while I was nursing my first (she was 9 months and on to solids). I totally understand on not wanting to take BCP. I hated them. My husband was “fixed” after our 3rd.
**Seeing her in the moby makes me want another one!!! She’s precious.
I loved using FAM per your recommendation and hope to use of again too. However I thought about the same thig. How on Earth can it work when one won’t be getting solid sleep. I think it only needs to ne three or four solid hours but even that can seem hard. Especially if it has to be at the same time every day! I’m interested to see what others say. I would hate to go back on the pill too. It made my hormones whacky and I lost a lot of hair after going off it. Nothing noticeable to others but I can feel the difference now. Total bummer.
Argh. The teacher in me is cringing at all the typos. Haha that’s what I get for commenting from my phone. Ps I love the moby!
FAM does not have to rely solely on temperatures. I know that some new moms chart their fluids instead of using temps. Fluids don’t require a certain hour of sleep, and they don’t have to be checked at the same time every day. That might offer you more flexibility. The only downside is that it might take a few months to learn your body.
I know the IUD sounds scary and creepy… but it’s been amazing. I’ve never been pregnant, so they say that insertion should have been really painful for me… but it just wasn’t that bad. They say if you get it put in soon after having a baby, it’s next to painless. I know, I know. It still sounds creepy. But you know what’s creepier for me? Ingesting a lot of hormones that I don’t know much about. The copper IUD has no hormones, and Mirena has very low hormone levels. It’s the most common form of BC in the world and it’s more effective than the pill. I know. It still sounds a little creepy. But I have to say, after having an IUD for six months and having the lightest, most comfortable periods of my life, I’m a convert. Oh, and it only cost $150 total for five years (with my insurance). Not too shabby.
I had an IUD back in the day and LOVED it, a Copper T. But then they took it off the market and replaced it with a hormone-added variety which I didn’t want to use because of the hormones. Now, it looks like they’ve come out with one similar to my old Copper T — it has copper but NO hormones. I would look into it. It’s called ParaGard. It’s easy to be freaked by the idea of the IUD but really, it was THE BEST. It might hurt a little getting one, like cramps, and it may make periods a tad more crampy for some women, but otherwise, out of sight, out of mind!
have you considered the ring?? Nuvaring. That’s good one! The only thing you have to worry about is, it’s not supposed to be out for longer than 3 hours… it can pop out during sex (or you can take if out if you remember to put it back in) but one of my friends used it for years and one morning she woke up and it was in the bed after sex the night before… long story short- she was pregnant a few weeks later!! It is a really great option though, as it’s every 3 weeks. Ask your doc 🙂
P.S. I don’t mind any questions you may have either. 🙂 I used it for about 2 years. 🙂
My husband and I use the Creighton method which does NOT require you to take your temp every morning. We love it! The catholic church actually doesnt endorse the temperature method because it’s hard to stay on top of for all the reasons you mentioned. Check with your church–they’ll likely have a person that can teach you the method. I feel like I’m in complete control without putting anything artificial in my body. 😉
I am in the same boat you are in. I was on BC for 10 yrs and after seeing what it did to my hormones I am not going back to them ever. Yes to hating condoms,
I can’t talk about issues I’m having on my blog bc my MIL ans SIL read. TMI.. Love that you can share this stuff here. I don’t have answers for you but actually am going to doc next week bc I swear they stitched me up way too much…or hormones from BF are giving me issues. I wonder if other women go through this? I know it’s not normal at this point!
I have an IUD (without having had any kids yet), and it’s really a fantastic option. I have the Mirena, and haven’t had a period for several years. That is kinda freaky at first, but I love it now. Pick whatever works best for you!
have you gained weight on it? I have a 3month old n i was wondering about mirena but a lot of ppl gain weight when they don’t get their period :/
the diaphragm! old school but effective…my midwife has practiced for 30 years and she’s only seen 2 girls get preggo using it (and both said it was from user error.) gotta be comfy with your body to use, and it’s a little tricky to put in/take out at first…good luck whatever you decide 🙂 i remember being so excited for my body and my life to go back to normal (just had a baby 4 months ago)…IT WILL! 🙂 just hang in there!! postpartum is not for sissies.
yes! i teach childbirth education and i have friends ask me about the diaphragm (one girl told me her doctor said they don’t make them anymore!! how rude!). old school but effective is right! : )
I was totally freaked by the idea of having an IUD put in. I thought I would feel it all the time but you truly don’t. It has been nice because there are no mood swings, weight gain, it is good for 5 years and I haven’t had a period since I got it put in almost 2 years ago.
I’d re-think the ID. I have the copper one and it’s zero hormones and lasts 10 years. There is minimal risk and you don’t have to do anything!
Oops…that’s “IUD!”
You know, I was totally weirded out by the whole IUD thing, but when I weighed my options (I am in a high risk for stroke on the pill) with my doctor I decided to give it a go (I got the hormone free, copper one). I have to say, it did hurt a bit and it was kind of more cramping than usual for a few months, but it has been so worth it. I’ve also heard that if u get one after you’ve had a baby, it hurts a lot less. I literally took 3 years to make the switch though!
I’m with you on the birth control pills. Went off them just before getting pregnant with our first, and after he was born my midwife wrote me a prescription for the pill but I never filled it. We ended up using condoms, they aren’t ideal but after using them a couple times it wasn’t such a mood kill after all. I’m now pregnant with our second and after this one’s born I’m not sure what we’ll do, but I don’t think I’ll go back on the pill.
You and the babe are precious!
I have a paragard IUD and love it. I picked it because it was the best option for us that didn’t involve hormones. I didn’t do well on BC but didn’t realize it until I went off to get pregnant. I highly recommend paragard 🙂
I would not recommend the paraguard iud (non hormonal one). TMI, but periods are awful…heavy and long. Otherwise it was fine lol! I had the mirena too (hormonal) and it was great, no periods, just spotting, but it made me really bloated. Others have no side effects. I have 2 kids and took the minipill while breastfeeding and it was fine. You do have to take it at the same time everyday. Now, after all these methods I am back on a low dose pill until dh gets snipped (we’re 38 and done). Gook luck Gina and I love your blog! Olivia is a beauty!!
I second the comments about the nuvaring. I’ve been using it for a couple of years now and it rocks! Put it in, wait 3 weeks and remove. It doesn’t get any easier. I fought painful ovarian cysts for years on the pill, the ring sorted that out. Good luck!
We’re pullers & prayers over here too. I’m making the Hubby get snip snipped if you know what I mean, although that’s probably not an option for you yet. 🙂
We used the thermometer method after having our kids (we have 3) and it worked great. I didn’t get pregnant again until we were ready and it helped us plan it right to have a boy. I would totally recommend it and the getting up at night didn’t affect my temp.
I know that everyone has different experiences and opinions on the IUD, but mine is this: avoid it as much as possible. I could write a novel on the amount of issues I had with my IUD. Switched over in favor of FAM, and am never looking back.
Thank you for my daily heart melt with that gorgeous picture of Livi 🙂
My doc suggested the mini pill but I declined. Now we just cross our fingers, ha! I got my period 3 mo pp, exclusively bfing, but I pumped during the day and my son slept for longer periods (used to!). Apparently after long stretches of your baby not eating its not effective. Sucks!
I am not a fan of any of the hormone based birth controls because of how I felt also. I am also someone who got pregnant while breastfeeding twins having never had a period. So when my 3rd was a few months old we looked in to the FAM method. I am not great at doing the temp thing so we looked in to other options. I found out about Siliva Ferning http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080917103821AAnGd72 and tracking my fertility with a microscope http://www.amazon.com/Ovulite-Unlimited-Personal-Ovulation-Microscope/dp/B0000E6I1R it was so easy to use and I could track when I was actually ovulating and when we should avoid or use protection. I have to say that we had our 4th 2 1/2 years after our 3rd when we planned and I even did my best to track and we gave it our best shot to get a boy as we already had 2 girls and 1 boy AND it worked!!!
I prefer the Depo-Provera shot. You only need to get it once every 3 months and you don’t have to think about it! It might be a good short term option for you until you figure out what you and Tom want to do later 🙂
If you are exclusively nursing, every 3-4 hours…you are good for the first six months.
I used FAM after all my kids with success….less temps and more awareness of cycles and CM and cervix checks.
I have friends who swear by the Mirena.
The mini pill is good from about 6 mos to a year, but I would not count on it after that.
BC pills kill your milk supply, which is okay if you are looking to cut back on nursing.
Tough decision. The IUD you are thinking about is not the same as the Mirena.
Loving all the sex talk 🙂 I had an IUD for 3 years and loved it!
birth control is never an easy thing to figure out. Unless not having sex is your thing. Haha. I am sure you will figure it out girl!
LOVE the Moby Wrap! I love how you can wrap them up and it’s almost like you are pregnant again (without half the discomfort).
I didn’t have a visit from AF until after my babies turned one (both kids – yes, I’m super lucky in that regard!) and I tried to chart after my first baby, but it was SUPER stressful. I thought I was pregnant at least 4 times. After baby #2 (she was somewhat unplanned in a we’re about to start trying but we’re not trying kind way) I got a ParaGard IUD (non-hormonal) and it’s SUCH a relief. It wasn’t painful and thankfully, I haven’t had any issues with it. Hormones make me loco (and I’m super sensitive) so the Mirena was NOT an option. I also love that if we do decide to have #3 we don’t have to wait – I just have to get it removed!
Haha! Not a fan of condoms. Hilare. Who is??
Try and look into IUDs, they’re hormone free and not a bad thing at all!!
We wanted our two children close, so as much as condoms are a buzz kill. They did the trick! Until we were ready. I got pregnant while breastfeeding and without ever getting period. So, I would go with what’s comfortable and what works!