Adventures in breastfeeding
I can always count on my good friend Jeni for advice. When I first got pregnant, she told me that I would be tempted to learn and read as much as I could about pregnancy and childbirth, but to definitely take the time to learn about baby care and breastfeeding, because breastfeeding is tough work.
I had no idea. Breastfeeding is intense… but once it clicks, it really does.
As I mentioned before, we had a rough couple of nights when we got home from the hospital. I had a delay between the colostrum and my mature milk coming in –which is pretty common- but that meant that little Livi was nursing around the clock, many times every 30 minutes to an hour from start to start. Combine that with a poor latching technique, trying to figure out what her cues are (is that the hungry cry? or the dirty diaper cry? or the “burp me” cry?) and no sleep, and it was a party over here.
Despite the fact that I read a couple of books on breastfeeding and we took a class together, it’s really different when you have an actual squirming, hungry little one in front of you. We would get to the point where her face would be red like a beet, she’d be shaking her head at me, and there was fury in her eyes- aka the angry elf face. At one point, she was pounding her fist against my breast, trying to beat the milk out it. There were quite a few times when I didn’t know if I’d be able to do it any longer, but I focused on one feeding at a time, even if the feeding took an hour to make sure she was getting enough. Now, we’re working as a team and getting the hang of it.
Things that have helped me:
Pumping-
I am SO glad I ordered this breast pump.
I started pumping in between feedings right away to stimulate production, so I’d feed Livi, Tom would burp her and change her diaper while I pumped. When I was done, she was ready to eat again. Now, my milk is completely good to go, so I don’t have to worry about pumping unless I want to take the edge off (like in the morning) and just to have a little extra to have in the fridge. The fact that I don’t have to pump during the night any more is a huge game-changer: I got 6 hours of broken sleep last night, and feel amazing. The pump will also come in handy when I go back to work.
Tom got me the hands-free pumping bustier to wear so I can pump both sides at once, and the other night while I was double-pumping, I told him I felt like I was being milked. He said to think of it as a supercool Lady Gaga boob contraption. 😉
A representative from Mama’s Latta came to speak to our Bradley class in the last week of classes. The consultants were highly recommended by our instructor, so I referred them to a friend who had similar challenges to mine a week before our baby was due. She said they helped immensely, so after our first tough night, I called Mama’s Latte and a consultant came to the house that day. Not only did she introduce me to My Brest Friend (more on that in a sec), she helped us with our latching technique and determined a strategy to increase my production and make sure that Livi was getting enough food. Since last Wednesday, she’s called every day to check and see how we’re doing, and has also emailed me handouts and videos.
(La Leche League is another great breastfeeding resource)
At first we were using the Boppy, but it was too low, so I’d try to prop it up with a pillow and Livi would slip into the middle. It ended up being more of a pain than a help. The representative from Mama’s Latte brought a Brest Friend pillow, and it’s made a huge difference. It straps on underneath your breasts and can be rotated around to accommodate different types of holds. When I walk around wearing it, I look like a hotdog vendor at a football game.
Nursing tank tops
I have a total of 4 (2 Target, 2 Bravado) and they’ve been through the wash many times in the past week and a half. Thank goodness I’ve been stuck in the house, because when I start to venture into the world again, it will be interesting to figure out nursing-friendly outfits. When we went over to our friends’ house on Saturday, I wore an Express tank top with a blazer, and it was easy to go into a guest room and feed the little one without any major costume changes in the process.
Lansinoh
First I was using the Motherlove salve and while it felt good, it didn’t do anything for healing the damage from a couple of days of poor latching. The Lansinoh has helped a ton.
Talking with friends.
I talked to my friend Michele for about an hour the other day, and she had a baby a few weeks ago. It was so nice to get to talk to someone who recently went through everything I’m going through, and discuss things you can’t exactly bring up in everyday conversation (like comparing nipples, haha). Just the fact that someone else has been there, agrees that it’s extremely hard, and can reassure you that it does indeed get better was incredible.
And she was right—everyday it’s getting easier and easier. Those first few nights, though… wow.
87 Comments
Leave a Comment
This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.
I once compared breastfeeding to running a marathon you haven’t trained for. It’s exhausting and challenging, but gets easier!
So glad everything’s getting better! Looks like a lot of great advice. 🙂
I’m going through the same thing right now… for the third time. It’s a new adventure with each baby. Hang in there and good luck!
This is the first chance I’ve had to wish you congrats! Livi is adorable! I haven’t had any time to sit at my computer and actually read a post… I’ve been reading via cell phone during my middle of the night feedings!
You’re so right, Sarah. It is different with each baby. I have four children (all teens now) and each one had his/her own learning curve. It’s so worth it, though. One of the great things I found with breastfeeding was that it forced me to slow down and relax while I nursed. Otherwise, I think I would have been go, go, go, trying to be Supermom and get everything done perfectly. Looking back all these years later, I wouldn’t trade those precious moments for anything! Enjoy it. It goes by all too quickly.
I LOVE the Breast Friend! I’ve been nursing for 8 months, and we’ve got it down to a science now…hang in there, it DOES get so much easier.
I think I will look into that pillow as I was going to get a boppy, but this one seems like it provides so much more support. Also on the pumping, one of my new mum friends did the same thing in order to get her flow up. Really informative post – thanks.
Nursing is hard work and for most people it does get easier. Hang in there….it is a challenge, but the payoffs for both of you are amazing! Keep up the great work you are already doing!
You just took me back to the rough first two weeks with my now three year old. I was in severe pain during breastfeeding but I was determined. It got better though and I nursed him for three months before I went back to work and weaning was not a problem.
With my second son there were no issues – no pain, no latching problems, nothing. I breastfed him for a year since I didn’t return to work. It was a little difficult to wean him but the doctor advised me to cut out all night feedings and within two weeks it was over. Thankfully because I was done.
Interestingly, the each presented a little challenge but if you can breastfeed it is so worth it. Luckily, you have someone you can talk to about that stuff. 😉
It can be so hard to find your breastfeeding groove, and you’re right — having supportive friends is crucial. The first five weeks, it hard SO bad every time I nursed. And E. was also one of those babies that wanted to nurse around the clock and she loved 45 minute sessions … every two hours. I would sit there with tears rolling down my cheeks because it hurt so bad but I knew that we could do it. Thankfully, I had a friend who was about six months ahead of me and she encouraged me and promised it’d get better. And one day, it just did, and then we had smooth sailing for the next 15 months! So if you’re already feeling better, you’re on the road!
Lanisoh is a miracle cream. It’s the only thing that worked for me too (and my husband uses it now on his nipples for marathon training!). The Lanisoh pads were the only nursing pads to ever get me through the night too when she started sleeping longer.
Sounds like you’re really getting the hang of it all!
Yay I registered for a My Brest Friend . . I hope someone gets it for me! If not, I will definitely make sure I pick one up before baby comes. I’m also planning on ordering the same pump.
Were you able to figure the pump out pretty easily or did it take a few tries to get it to work? I feel so clueless when it comes to BFing and pumping. I need to read up on the topic more! I also get so confused when I read about people BFing and pumping concurrently. Is it just one of those things I’ll figure out once baby is here?
When you have your kidlet, ask the nurses on your post-maternity floor to help you learn to pump. Most hospitals have pumps you can use while you’re there, so you can try out what’s available! They’re also really good (for the most part) at helping you try different positions for latching and feeding. If you get one that’s not helpful, ask if another nurse would be willing to try!
Also, the lactation specialists can totally explain the pump/breastfeed concurrently idea. The gist is, you keep pumping to keep milk supply up even if you’re having trouble with latching/feedings, and you can bottle feed or spoon feed the expressed milk as a supplement to make sure baby’s getting enough. Some people also pump so that their partner can get up in the middle of the night to feed the baby sometimes if they’re really really tired, or they start pumping so that the baby has a constant supply of breast milk even when they have to go back to work and so forth. Some people will skip a feeding and just use the milk they’ve pumped… it all depends on the baby’s feeding schedule, what’s going on in your life, etc.
Your breasts actually create more supply in relation to the demand, so if you pump more, your body responds like the baby’s feeding more and you end up producing more milk. If you pump instead of breastfeeding (as my BFF had to do, she had flat nipples and kidlet just couldn’t get the hang of it) then you end up pumping on the schedule you’d be feeding on (mostly).
Hope this is helpful! (Just had OB rotations in nursing school recently, so this info’s all fresh…)
it was very easy to figure out! the instruction manual was short, too, which i appreciate 😉
Thank you both (Wendy and Gina) for all of the information!!
I used the Boppy too at first then switched to the Brestfriend, what a difference is right! The only this I used my Boppy for was to sit on while nursing her. 😉
This is great info…I plan to register for a My Brest Friend…it looks awesome and I love the name ;).
So I have a question…hopefully it’s not FMI:
So after you pump and little one is hungry is there enough milk in there to feed her again? And also, are you feeding her the pumped milk via bottle or other way? I am worried about the whole ‘nipple confusion’ thing in the beginning and I’m sure the lactation consultants explained this.
Thanks!
I was also wondering about that as well. I’m due this Sunday and I’ve been worried about breastfeeding (like if my baby will be able to latch correctly? Will I have enough milk? Will I need to pump to get milk flowing?).
Congratulations on your precious baby girl!
I can’t relate, since I’m one of your non-Mommy readers…but I’m glad to hear things are all good on the breastfeeding front. 🙂
What strategy did the consultant recommend to keep up production? I have also just.barely. made enough milk and it sucks.
I am so glad it is going well for you!
Breastfeeding is so hard but like you said there’s only so much preparing you can do before you have a real hungry baby to practice with. Glad it’s going well for you. It becomes such an enjoyable experience! The baby loves the snuggle time too. So much so my first daughters first word was “boob” at 8 months!
Such a valuable post. I wish I had read something like this when I was first nursing. I thought bf was going to be easy, natural and just all around awesome. I had trouble with supply, latch, holds (never got comfy with the boppy) etc. I told my husband that with a 2nd one that I would want to start pumping right away just as you have. I did find a breast feeding support group through the hospital where I delivered, and the lactation nurses were great help. Plus, it was great to get out of the house. Best wishes to you and your new family!
I am so glad things are getting better for you!! I almost gave up with my first but with support was able to continue successfully. I am happy that things are getting easier and that you didn’t give up! She is so beautiful!!
Holy smokes, I can not even imagine! It must have been so stressful feeling like you could not feel the little one properly! I am so glad to hear that you have come to a better place, and that there are so many people/things around you to make things nicer. You are an amazing woman FS!!!
It took us a while to “get it” too. Everyone that says it gets easier is totally right. We’re going strong at 9.5 months now!
Gina – I can totally relate. I had my son in August and suffered the exact way you did. My milk took 6 days to come in! We had latch issues also and I had a consultant come to the house also (helped a ton). We rented a hospital grade pump to encourage my milk to come in and I pumped every 3 hours around the clock until my milk came in. But like you said, every day it got easier and eventually things just clicked! And here we are 5 months later and going strong. Sometimes I’m amazed at the amount of milk that comes out of my body! And just wait til Olivia starts sleeping through the night. Your boobs will be rock hard and so painful in the morning. But I kind of like it, strangely… all that food in there that is making my little baby boy grow big and strong. Such a miracle. Best of luck to you – being a mommy is the very best thing in the whole world.
So happy nursing is going well! I really loved it, and I was so happy to have never used a bottle…ever! My daughter used to beat on me when it was not as fast coming as she liked, too! I used to set a washcloth under her cheek/mouth to help with dripping…that way you won’t have to wash the support pillow as often.
Just wait until your body gets so tuned to her cry….you may be surprised that any cry will turn on the “faucet”. I would be changing her diaper, and it would go-a-gusher!
Oh, speaking of diaper changes…I learned to have everything ready before opening the dirty diaper, and when you are done cleaning, leave a wipe on top of her “area”…that will prevent any unexpected pee accident (or worse no.2) from going all over the place. It can shoot out like a fire hose! Once I was doing a last minute change before going to my mom’s for Thanksgiving, and was surprised by a no.2 accident. A wardrobe change was necessary for me!
That pillow saved my life! The boppy really is useless for breastfeeding. I used to walk around with the pillow strapped around my waist (topless of course) and you’re right – it’s quite the spectacle! But hey – whatever works 🙂 I had a rough first week with the breastfeeding, too – for the same reasons as you. My milk supply didn’t come in yet and we didn’t master the latching technique. But once we got the hang of it, it was the best thing ever. I’m so glad we stuck with it!
Glad things are looking up! The first two weeks were the hardest for us.. after that things slowly fell into place. Now, at 11 weeks PP, things are almost.. dare I say it.. predictable.
My little girl is 11 weeks now, and we have struggled with breastfeeding from the beginning and are now beginning a slow transition to formula (I’m planning to take several weeks, if not months, to transition). It still takes her an hour or more to get a good nursing in and so I have been pumping and feeding since she was a week old. With me going back to work in a few days, I’ve decided that my time would be better spent enjoying her than pumping every 2-3 hours. I am so grateful that we made it this far. The hospital that I delivered at had a phenomenal breastfeeding office and if it hadn’t been for them (I met with them at least once a week every week until she was 6 weeks old since we were struggling so much between latching issues, supply issues, weight gain issues, severe reflux, and on and on) we would have been done with breastfeeding a long time ago. I hope that when I have my next baby it will be different, but this has taught me so much.
So glad you’re getting everything figured out. I think everyone (including me with no children) have this idea that breastfeeding will be no big deal, but I know it is no walk in the park for anyone. Go mama go!
okay that kind of came out wrong. what I meant was that people feel like it’s this natural thing so it shouldn’t be challenging, but it totally is.
There we go.
Yay! Glad you love My Breast Friend. I’m a Pediatrician and always recommend it to my nursing moms! The babies tend to fall forward on the boppy – and it dosn’t have the back support like MBF does. Congratulations to you guys! You will be a great mom (and dad) 🙂
I couldnt agree more with every single word you said (wrote) here. Good for you sticking with it. It is H A R D! And thank goodness for all the support that is out there both in Lactation consultant and hands free bustiers 🙂 I know I couldnt have gotten through without them. Keep at it mama, your doing great!
Lansinoh is a savior for breastfeeding nipples! And I always tell women who plan to breast feed to give it 6 weeks. Push through the first 6 weeks because after that it is SO much easier.
Good for you for sticking with it! I was so tempted to just throw in the towel the first couple weeks. I would cry and tense up everytime my husband brought the baby to nurse. I felt awful because I didn’t think she was getting enough milk. We had a lc/visiting nurse come and help us one day she was a lifesaver. I don’t think I would have continued without the support of my mom, my sister and my husband. They were all encouraging me to do whatever I thought was best for me and my daughter… I decided to stick it out and 4 months in I am so happy I did! It was a glorious day when the milk came in! Its amazing how there are people who will talk you out of it , but I am so glad that I stuck to my guns and got the support I needed. It does get better and I am soo glad it did for you! Happy to see everything is going so well for you 🙂 It is an unbelievable feeling knowing you can nurture your child!
So happy to hear it’s going well Gina, and yeah, the Boppy was always so low. I ended up stuffing pillows underneath it on all sides. However, it does work great for propping up the baby before they can sit up on their own. 🙂
Also, I had an idea for a possible future readers request post. Nutrition during Breastfeeding, Possibly offer healthy options for keeping up calorie intake and energy level while nursing. I have been more hungry then I was during pregnancy but I am running out of healthy options for snacks and meals that sustain me during the day. Any information would be greatly appreciated! 🙂
that’s a great idea! i’m a LOT hungrier too.. even in the middle of the night, i have to have a snack
Do you have certain books you recommend on breastfeeding? Your friend was so right – I’ve literally read every book on pregnancy and natural childbirth that I can get my hands on, and I’m only 20 weeks tomorrow! Haha – it might be the overachiever in me. I’d love to start my homework on breastfeeding though.
Another question – and hopefully its not TMI: my Mom said something about “toughening up” my nipples before the baby comes by rubbing them with a wash cloth (which kind of weirds me out haha). Did you learn anything about this in your class or from the LC that came to your house? Would you recommend it?
I really liked The Nursing Mother’s Companion.
i read the new mother’s guide to breastfeeding and the nursing mother’s companion
i’ve heard about that (bethanny frankel recommends it, i think?) but didn’t try it. i could see how it would help, though. things are hurting over here
Thanks ladies!
The boppy- ahhh! We had the same problem with it. Now I try to tell every pregnant woman I know to not get the boppy (for breastfeeding). Hailey liked resting in the boppy, but it was useless with breastfeeding. I’m so glad to hear things are starting to click 🙂
i didn’t read through the comments you’ve received so far but i can’t to anyone about breastfeeding without recommending dr. sears’ ‘the breastfeeding book’. after a week of successful breastfeeding, i started experiencing severe pain each time my daughter latched. i finally reached a point, after having a la leche league leader visit my house, where i didn’t think i could go on. basically i ended up having to give my daughter bottles of breast milk for five days until finally realizing that wasn’t sustainable and we had to get back on te boob! i bought dr. sears’ book and never looked back. now we have been successfully breastfeeding for eight months. i recently had to reference the book again when i got a plugged duct and near mastitis and once again, it was a HUGE help!
It is really great you have found folks to support you nursing you babe, My oldest (now 25 yrs!! would ONLY nurse when I her in the football, or clutch hold until she was NINE months-took a few weeks to get her to accept a different position, and then she would make sure I was doing NOTHING else while nursing as she playfully would rub her very tiny first teeth on me to keep ME in line!! So happy things are going well for you and your family!!
My first baby was so hard to nurse. He didn’t latch on and nurse for the first 30 hours. I was pumping and feeding him with a medicine dropper because I REALLY wanted him to get colostrum. For the first three months, it was a nightmare to nurse him, often taking two hours to get it done just to wake up an hour and a half later and do it all over. It got better and it was totally worth it, but I was a zombie for those 3 months and had almost no life.
I’ve had two other babies since then who latched on right away and nursed well. Even with a “good nurser” breastfeeding can be draining.
Hope it becomes easier for you soon, just know you’re not the only momma who has thought about giving up the whole breastfeeding thing.
Bravado bras, my BrestFriend (not the Boppy <– that's good for when they're older if you still need a pillow, but not the early days; the Brestfriend is soooo much easier, firmer, flatter, adjustable, 100% better choice IMO), the class, having a housecall from an LC or one you can call on the phone, all were lifesavers for me in the early days.
"There were quite a few times when I didn’t know if I’d be able to do it any longer, but I focused on one feeding at a time, even if the feeding took an hour to make sure she was getting enough." <– GIRL YES!! That's all you can do is one.feeding.at.a.time. If someone told me in the first week, or month, or even first THREE months of nursing that I'd be doing this for years and come to cherish it, love it, and feel it was second nature, Id have laughed.
It DOES get easier and if you ever feel you need support, or want to quit, need guidance, etc…I became a lactation educator b/c I was so passionate about it…so just email me or text me, I'm here for ya! Day or night! I know how it is.
when my cousin was nursing her baby boy in the car when he was 6 months, she would lean over the car seat (kinda like she was hugging the car seat) and and her son would be in his seat and nurse. The first time I saw her do it I had no idea what was going on. Then she said that she was feeding him and I thought it was pretty genius!!
I’m so proud of your determination! Breastfeeding was also one of the hardest things for me. I only made it three months but instead of being angry at myself for not making it longer–I was happy for the three months I was able to provide my sweet child. 🙂
Keep up the hard work!
Cheers to you for sticking with it!! When my son (now 3) was first born, we would both cry through the feedings : ) It gets MUCH easier. My goal was 3 months, and I ended up nursing for a year!
that gives me hope.
I’m so happy things are going well for you! The beginning is really tough, it’s just like you said, feed, burp, change, feed, repeat. No breaks. You can’t go anywhere. our first trip to the mall I fed her before we left, it took like 20 minutes to get there, and she was hungry again and I had to feed her in the car. That happened every time we went ANYWHERE. It got better as time went on.
I LOVE my pumping bustier…but I hate pumping :/ I’m like a Nazi with the milk I pump. It’s SO much easier just feeding her or coming between clients to feed her and saving the milk for my longer days at work. I hate cleaning and sanitizing bottles too. I give credit to the moms that have to do that! I was so clueless in the beginning. I thought…yea..I’ll just pump a lot and Mike can feed the baby sometimes, and whoever else. No…so much easier to just feed her from the boob all the time. I even tried pumping into a bottle for when we went out the first few months. I won’t do that again for baby #2.
So funny….I had my brest friend, brought that to the hospital and used it the first couple of weeks and hated it. I ended up returning it and getting a boppy! My stomach hurt so bad those first few weeks the brest friend was uncomfortable to me. I ended up propping a pillow under my arm anyway when I sat up. In fact, I do that with my boppy too. Not sure what I was doing wrong with the BF pillow.
Lansinoh–I got samples of that in the hospital, and my medela cream and the coconut butter nipple cream never got used. After 3 weeks and getting through my latching issues I ended up not needing it
So the first week I went back to work I set up my schedule so I could come home between clients to pump. My mom was at my house watching Ella and I had about 20 minutes to come home, pump and head back out. I used to be really modest and shy and here I was…zipping through my house, topless putting on my white nursing bustier with the pumping shields in it, grabbing my robe, then getting my pump, huge water in the other hand and my mom took one look at me and laughed so loud. She said–if I told you a year ago that you would be running through your house dressed like that, doing what you’re doing you would have said ewwww, no way. She was right. I couldn’t care less now.
…and that’s my novel for the night. eek. I love talking babies though
Haha, such awesome visual imagery there.. 😀
Ok, so I’m not pregnant and have never had kids… heck, I’m not even married yet but this is SUCH a great post! So interesting and helpful for new moms and soon-to-be new moms! I’ll be coming back to reference this if/when I can use it! Glad it’s going well for you. 🙂
Just thought of you! A Phil and Ted Dash Stroller is on sale through RueLaLa for $399 (original $770) http://www.ruelala.com/product/detail/eventId/44208/styleNum/1511742300/viewAll/0
Just figured I’d share. Let me know if you need any other link to join RueLala.com
wahoo!!! THANK YOU
I have never done it, but reading your story, I’m gaining a new respect for my sister and cousins, many of whom have done it more than once! I remember one day when my sister had to share with me the most amazing thing. It was a really hot day and she was astounded that her milk had become more watery and thinner. Her body knew that her baby would be needing more hydration and just .. organised it. We both sat in awe of how the body ‘just knows’. It is quite amazing and miraculous, when you stop and think about it.
You’re doing such a phenomenal job! I’m so glad that you haven’t had to go to formula like so many other moms have to do due to their milk supply =/
we bought some and were ready to give it to her, and that night when i pumped, milk actually came out. it was amazing
Yay! I’m so happy it’s working out for you, Gina 🙂 And six hours of sleep…I remember the feeling from the first uninterrupted sleep. It’s like…unimaginable happiness.
i’m so excited to get more than 2 hours of uninterrupted sleep… hopefully soon
Love hearing about others going through the same thing. And I totally hated the boppy too. Good thing it was just a shower gift!
Medela makes a nipple ointment that I thought was hands down the best! I have found it at target and babies r us. I tried the lansinoh but the medela was way better!!!!
i tried a sample of that and loved it, but didn’t see it at babies r us :/
Love the honesty! Thanks for sharing the details, I’m learning so much!
It does get better and better. We feel like old pros at 6 months now! But boy.. they aren’t kidding when they say it’s tough at first. I was just going to say that I invested in the coolest nursing sports bra (la leche). I looooove it. i wear it most of the time when I’m home and it fits better and is more comfortable than all of my other nursing bras combined (though all of those bras combined would be pretty awkward. ha!)
True, Breast feeding is tough in the beginning, so many give up…Great job for sticking with it! You’ll be so glad you did. I didn’t get a good breast pump until my 4th child. Whoa- wish I would have had that the whole time! 🙂